NEIGHBOR'S "GREAT WALL" NOT THAT IMPRESSIVE

Madison, WI
Ocotober 13, 2005

Arthur Janksis kept his word that he was going to build a "Great Wall" but neighbors insist that its really not that great.

"Its kind of dinky," says Barbara Uluhg. "It's not at all what I had in mind when he warned us he was going to do it."

Last summer, Janksis got fed up with his fellow neighbors and set out to make his own version of the Chinese Wall.

"It was the damn dogs that got to me," he said. "All day long, tearing up my garden, frightening the birds, and peeing on my bushes. I had it. Well, one day all of them sons a bitches were outside for the 4th of July parade and I let them know that the next time one of their dogs came in my yard there would be hell to pay! Wouldn't you know it not 15 minutes after I got back that damn Uluhg dog was in my backyard eating up my tomatoes. I grabbed the dog and went right back there and told them I was going to make the biggest wall they had ever seen. Big as the Great God Damn Wall of China!"

Janksis has been working on the wall ever since with materials from his back yard. Turns out making a Great Wall is more expensive that he thought.

"Well, I'm on a fixed income so I had to make do with what I gots. But I think I did a damn fine job, anyway."

Despite all of his best efforts, his neighbors are less than impressed.

"Its got to be the dumbest thing I have ever heard of anyone doing in my life," said one neighbor. "In fact, the only thing that wall keeps out are the mice. Oh well, as long as it makes him happy."

Janksis claims that he can now sleep in peace knowing that he proved his point.

"I know that I got the last laugh on those bastards. Look at that marvel out there. Its a god damned thing of beauty. I wonder if they can see this one from space too."